Him Not Nice Mama

About 2 yrs ago I went into Apples to Zinnias with my friend, Wendy and the LGs. The LGs were still in a stroller. When we walked the man working there looked like he was going to blow a gasket. He followed us around and made us feel really unwelcome. I called the next day and talked to the owner. The owner was as nice as could be and apologize profusely. A week later I went in and bought the wallet I had been trying to look at when I was in there the first time.

Today I had A LOT of time to kill in Orlando so I met Wendy at Borders. After that we went to lunch, then I asked her if she wanted to go to A to Z with us. She said sure.

As we walked into the store I saw the employee behind the counter bristle as if he had just seen something that really makes him angry. I told the girls they could touch things with 2 fingers but could not pick them up. As we rounded a corner Avery came face to face with her first Christmas tree of the season. She was touch, touch, touching it. I repeated my touch but dont pick-up rule a few times. I noticed that the employee (who was still behind the counter talking to another patron) was visibly upset everytime one of the girls touched or even looked at something. He would lurch forward and make an audible noise, like he wanted to yell "STOP!!!!"

I saw that Avery was bending my rule a bit. She was taking two ornaments and "tinking" them together. Not pulling them off the tree but making them touch so that they made a pretty noise. I told her a few times to stop. She wasn't listening. In my head I thought, 'I could make her stop. then she would move on to something more expensive or I could take my chances with the $12 ornaments. ok, I would rather pay for those then something $100 that I dont want.' So I kept walking and the clerk was getting more and more upset. I was about 3 feet away from Avery with Emerson in between the two of us and the clerk yelled, "Hey, They are not listening to you!" I of course was already on edge due to the way he was acting so I turned around and realized he was the same guy from 2 yrs ago. Here is a paraphrased version of the conversation(yelling match) that happened next. I am not proud of my self for loosing my temper. I am trying to be a better role model for the girls...I do believe though that I did a lot less yelling then he did.

"Your the guy who was nasty to me the last time I was in here!"
"Probably, if you had them with you."
"Let me talk to your manager."
"Im the owner."
"I dont think so."
"I'll bet you $50, 000 I am!"
"whatever, If they break something I will pay for it."
"YES, YOU WILL PAY FOR SOMETHING IF THEY BREAK IT!"
as if the fates were listening my gentle little Emerson who was standing right in front of me picked up the ugliest ceramic reindeer ever and dropped it.
"OK, YOUR GONNA BUY THAT!"
"IT'S NOT BROKEN!!!" and it wasn't

"Emerson Avery, come on we are leaving."
"Good. (something I dont remember, but it wasn't nice)"
Avery looked at me and I said, "Come on we are not welcome here." and she started to cry (like a fit cause she did not want to leave) "No, Avery we are leaving...Wait actually cry, cry like you you've never cried before." She just looked at me like, 'what? you've never asked me to cry before...'

Im thinking I need to plan a playdate with all my Mothers of Multiples friends.

When we left I had to go sit to calm myself down and Wendy then told me he was talking about me and the girls to the other customer. Avery said, "Him not nice, Mama." I agree Avery, him not nice.

For those of you who own a business...here's a little customer service advice: If you are worried about a child breaking something all you have to do is engage the child. Talk to them about the things they are looking at. Show them other "shiny" stuff. It does two very important things. 1. It lets you keep tally of what the kid has it's grubby little hands on. 2. It gives the parent time to SHOP!!! SPEND MONEY!!!

I was in retail for over 10 yrs... I should know...

Birthday Palooza

We had the girls birthday on Halloween this year. It was great but boy was I tired by the end of they day. Party in the morning then trick or treating that evening! We had a bounce house again this year and the girls had a blast with all of their friends and family.

Here is a slide show of the Birthday Party:

"Picnik Show"

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The girls got princess outfits from thier Tanta Deb. CUTE CUTE CUTE!!!

"Picnik Show"

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Julie's dad, the girls Papa, came to visit during Birthday Palooza and took us to dinner for Julie's Birthday. We went to the original Columbia Restaurant. The girls loved the dancers, but Avery doesn't like loud noises. The dancers make a realyloud noises when they dance. Avery held her fingers in her ears and enjoyed the show. Oh, and check out the tallent of my 3 yr olds? They can hand spoons from their noses!

"Picnik Show"

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The following Saturday was Cameran's Birthday Party at Chuck E Cheese. I love CEC, really I do...I like ski-ball, I love collecting the tickets, I love feeding then to the machine that munches them up, and I love buying crappy toys with the tickets... But, after going to my first birthday party at CEC I have to say... I HATED CHUCK E CHEESE that day. They have the tables too close, they rush you through like its some sort of military drill. Some of my extended in-law family are not people I would ever choose to hang out with much less be IGNORED by... Let's just say it was not a fun time had by Patty, however I think all the kids had a good time.

"Picnik Show"

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Life Lessons

1. Potty Chairs should NOT EVER be put over your head.

This fact was learned a few wkends ago. I was sitting at the computer and I heard Julie say, "oh you have that stuck on your head." So I got up and started walking toward the bathroom. As I stood up I could see Emerson had the princess patty seat cover around her neck like a really big necklace. I walked up and tried a few times to get it off and was unsuccessful. I kind of started to panic a little and said I thought we may need to call the fire department. Emerson was completely calm and smiling the whole time, but Avery looked like she could loose it at any moment. So, Julie had us all go into the living room and sit down and try a few more times before we dialed 911. Wise choice Julie Brown! A few more tries and I was able to get it unstuck from her cranium.

2. Grab the camera EVEN if you think you may need to call 911!

I cant believe neither Julie nor I thought to grab the camera and get a picture of Emerson with the Princess Potty Seat stuck over her head!

3. Bars can be kid friendly!

I have a friend, she is also the girls swim teacher and mom of one of their friends Scout, she works at a bar as a bartender part time. She kept inviting us (kids included) to The Market on friday nights, saying it is "Kid Friendly". Another friend of mine went one friday night and reported back that they had a great time, Anna (the girls friend) included. So, I figured one friday night we could do that as our Family Fun Night. We've been twice now and the kids love it. They have live music, YUMMY pizza and the kids dance like crazy to the music.

I bet this is not the last time this photo will be taken... (no, they are not drinking anything stronger then juice)

This is Avery photo-bombing these people we do not know. Notice how they are looking at one camera and Avery is looking at ours!

The lead of the band and Emerson... Julie is concerned that this will be her future son-in-law...

4. When in doubt, wear walking shoes!

I got to go to my first NFL football game a few weeks ago. Julie's work owns like 4 seats and they give them out for rewards. We decided to take advantage of cheaper then stadium parking and park at a stripper club. One of many near the stadium. Well, the walk killed me. I was wear my usual shoes, one of my pairs of flip-flops. We got to see the Saints beat the tar out of the Bucs but it was still fun. There were some crazy people there though...one man gold leafed his whole body, a lady 2 rows above us kept drunkenly waving her boa and saying, "I can feel the breeeeeeze". Then there was the man who was wearing a flordelis on his junk...

When the girls say "Tampa Bay Bucs" it sounds like "Papa Day Ducks" cracks me up every time!

3. Dont take more kids to the bathroom then you can handle.

My limit apparently is two... Went to lunch with Christy, Randy, and Cameron at Brio a few weeks back. At the end of lunch all the kids said they had to "tee tee" so I volunteered to take them all. We get in there and I put Cam on the potty first. He is taking forever, and I notice Emerson is holding herself and hopping around, so I pull her jumper down and put her on another potty. I walk back to Cam and switch him for Avery (seems like everything is going great right?) After putting avery on the potty I turn to help Emerson off her potty and see that she has peed on her ENTIRE outfit. You see, commercial toilets are really big and little girls cant get very far back on them without falling in so the stream goes right over the bowl and hits the clothes around the ankles. She had on a jumper...neck to shorts, wet.

As I am looking through my bag I see Avery trying to open the exit door. She is buck-a$$ neked...why neked and not naked? Cause neked is being naked and upto no good! I tell her NOT to exit the bathroom and turn my attention back to Emerson who is now also naked and crying in ball on the bathroom stall floor. I tell her all I have is a t-shit and a new pair of underwear for her too wear. She cries more. I turn around to see Avery dancing NEKED in the middle of the bathroom. Cameron was just kind of sitting back and watching the show.

Emerson left the restaurant in panties and a t-shirt.

4. Smaller is sometimes better.

We took the kids to an organic pumpkin patch to pick out some pumpkins. We picked out 2 nice big ones to buy. On the way out the girls saw these "tiny little pumpkins" that they wanted. I told them we would buy some at publix cause they were too expensive and we dont need organic cause we wont actually eat the tiny ones. They talked about "tiny little pumpkins" non stop for like 4 days. Then Julie came home from the store with some TLP and you would have thought she brought them a pony!